Apose magazine was a labor of love, change, discouragement, encouragement, discovery, life and ego death. I started concepting the idea for the magazine in 2022 while foregoing many personal changes. I just moved from Seattle to Los Angeles, at the height of the pandemic, recovering from what felt like a loss of self-identity as a creative.

I found immense inspiration in this rediscovery. Finding new music, new artists, new fonts, new colors. It felt like a personal renaissance. But at the same time, I fell back into old habits of perfectionism and inability to move past what felt like a final-final version. And then I just never released it. I felt like I failed myself and the people with whom I worked on this.

So why now? I find deep irony in the fact that the magazine I created to explore opposing ideas found itself in the development of this magazine. So while it may not be perfect and the stories may be old now, I can look back on this project still and be proud of the growth that has come from this. Keep moving on.